last night

i got my intelligentsia on & said goodbye to a good friend. i'll miss you much, especially on those late late LATE nights. i aint gonna lie, i was caught off guard but i bounced back. thx c-squad for the support... another one just bit the dust. hahaha. cant believe that shit. whatever though. this baby right here was too pretty to drink & strong as fuck. it tasted like a new place.

aniwais, to help ease the pain & dull my caffeine high, my fambam was there for me w/the newest addition, BELLA. we wasted no time and tuuuubed til no end. here's something stupid but fuckin funny.

pinto, not the beans

someone's milking the slumdog train. & im not talking about the cute life-imitating art-imitating life real slumdog kids. im talkin bout indian born, ms. freida pinto. shit, get yours girl. i hope scarlet wont be jealous that woody's got a new muse in town. this girl is flawless right now. she purdy.

READ ALL ABOUT HER

esotsm

im tired. my eyes have bags on bags and these bags have carry ons. but listening to this was the best part of my day to make up for the doses of reality i had. it is what it fuckin is. on a contemplative note, the run around just aint cute anymore. it was for a minute. i was being friends w/wishful thinking for too long. but he's moody about shit & doesnt know what he wants. i need to get closer to the reality of the situation. he may be harsh but he always tells me how it is. i just want so badly for this crappy month to be over w/. i cant wait for next month i think i'll be way more stressed outta my mind but nonetheless happier. maybe i'll be able to sleep better. i feel like a robot. my drug of choice has been coffee, im hooked. i think my body is 75% caffeine right now. well as snoop spits it, it is what it is baby boo. but i'll be better person tomorrow. i promise. i've come to realize who matters, who never did, who wont anymore & who always will. the beats will be my comfort for now; they never let me down. for now, ima stock up on that gold paint.

She said she never fell in love with a superman
Christian, Muslim, Protestant, Lutheran,
I told her that being a mortal is a portal to the true nature of growth; the Christ like Buddha man
That's why I never spit the traditional garbage of a night fight, bright lights, white ice to the fans
The radio is just a stereo, like a house and a home, a chair is just a chair, ask Luther Van
Go to work; go to church let your dreams die
Bow tie, final call, and a bean pie
yarmulke for Hanukah, wish list for Christmas
This is the jist of the life that we lead, why?
So you can fit in, with the close minded in the sit-ins, and clothes lined ed-end
I could care less about a plaque and Benz and get Punked on TV by my friends
Don't get a nigga wrong, I get tempted by the rewards that all come along with nigga songs
But what does it mean if I'm a Muslim and you a Jew and because of that alone we don't get along
And when you talk like this, and try to walk like this the radio stations'll never put a nigga on
Just Mims, just 50, just Wayne, just Jeezy, Dem Franchize Boyz, and Jimmy Jones
Fuck that, fuck rap this God-hop,
King-dom mu-sic for the hard rocks
Imma spit it till TRL get it and Hot97 hear the nigga with a bomb drop
Ask Flex, ask Slay, ask Who Kidd
Just blaze said Jay is the new kid
I took Eternal Sunshine and I looped it
No drums no hook just new shit

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

The handling of a heart is a very delicate art cause it's paper thin
One irrelevant thought, that started out as a spark, could be a poisonous dart, that leaves a permanent mark, that's ice cold in the day, and burns in the dark, and makes you never wanna see her face again
Tee-hee what a place I'm in
Lead me to the sta-ti-on
A one way ticket, don't look back
One cold tear that froze and cracked
A whole lot of pain I'm holding back
Shaft said "F that roll the sack"
I said If my skull was cracked
and blood ran out to the cul-de-sac
That could not match me where I'm at
My memories flash me there and back
Yup, there goes me right there in black
Holdin hands not starin back
She starts cryin i start denying that it's my fault and I'm aware of that
Man. in hindsight signs be glarin back
Where's the map to show you where you at
I could hear the crowd yelling, i could smell the tire smoke, i could hear the starter pistol where's the track
Ring, no answer, came home late
Jane told Dick she had a date
But they just chillin
and at that moment the right brain said to the left just kill em
Make the headlines, make the front page, wild out in the court house manthrill em
They'll say the boy dead wrong but i feel em

While you blowing X amount of dollars on the bracelet
The sovereign nation of France was opening their files on the UFO phenomenon I.E. spaceships
This just the facts jack may as well face it
Every rhyme i write the seal get cracked in the chapter of revelations
A atom get cracked in the blackness of meditation
Mysterious shit
Call me Jay Dogon I'm on some serious shit
Scholars wonder why do he bust
Allah blessed me with a mighty Midas[e] touch
Everything i lay the hands turn to Ethiopian gold
Shiny and buffed
I got a firm understanding on the minus and plus
So I ain't got time to argue with a rapper about how he aint got rhymes that's fuckin with mine
I'm trynna kill Lucifer
So if i have to break case a rapper in my face telling me that he the great
You could get a shiny nickle i'll blast his mother fuckin ass way past Jupitar
You couldn't be stupider
Fuckin with the nuclear
Mayan, Aztec lion
Asiatic black man from Zion
Quetzalcoatl supreme
Letting off steam
Dimethyltryptamine make a man dream
But ya'll would much rather hear me rappin about trash
The size of Erykah's ass, blunts, and cash
We need savin
Minds are consumed with swine we need bathin

dopest dope

my break at the end of long productive day. i choose to shake it off wit some laughs. sometimes a really good laugh helps me to chillax among other things/paraphernalia (pa - ra - pher - nay - lee - ah) (i only wish). here's what i tubed & wanted to share goods.

hahaha this big ass pix. if you liked loved pineapple express you'll enjoy this. watched me some oscar awards & thanx GOD i caught this skit. we were laughing from beginning til end. didnt expect this from the academy awards but the audience seemed to dig these 2 stoners. for a minute i thought i was watching a mtv award show. maybe everyone was toking pre-show, to take the edge off. ya know all those movie folk are all potheads anyways. hahaha. why do u think they have cushy trailers, to "relax" between scenes. but love these 2 duuuuudes. they make me laugh. out loud. haha.

but hands down, my all time favorite laugh-yo-ass-off award show skits can be summed up in this quote: "its more like im a stunt...one---bull." ya'll know which one im talkin bout. tom crOOze: mission IMprobable. hahahahaha. this shit right here, laugh til your stomach hurts status everytime. those 2 are untouchable.

im so wired right now.

40 days and 40 nights

ashes, ashes, we all fall down. its ash wednesday which only means lent is here = time for soul searching, sacrifice, repentance & reflection for all the catholic folk. yes i embrace my spirituality. you definitely know its lent when you see all those fast food chains heavily endorsing their fish sandwiches e.g. mcdo w/99cents filet-o-fish or jack-in-the-crack w/2 for $3 fish fillets. hahaha. watch you'll see. it's sacrifice and growth through self-denial. should i give up or gain something? im not sure what im gonna do. but in the past, i have managed to give up something for the full 40 days/nights & it felt so good to know that i had the self control to do it. now, i was thinking about giving up blogging (nah, dont think so) but true sacrifice would mean giving up ONE of my weaknesses. not just food/soda but something significant to better myself. maybe i'll just do a little something something extra (a really good deed here & there). we'll see. btw, dont be freaked out or judge people w/black crosses on their foreheads. they didnt forget to wash their faces; they supposed to look like that.

anyhoo, this time always reminds me of the movie, 40 days & 40 nights. a movie w/nudity & strong sexual content is associated w/lent? well ya. its about a guy who freely chooses to stay celibate (no sex whatsoever) for the 40 days of lent until conflict comes in the form of his dream girl, shannon sossamon. but i love this movie. i love shannon & josh as an onscreen couple. but i remember watching this in theatres and instantly wanted to buy the dvd after. that was when movie-to-dvd took a long ass time. on the biggest side note, ashton kutcher & katie holmes were set to play the parts of matt & erica; thank GOD scheduling conflicts caused them to reject.

Erica: If I told you, "Don't think about the color red", what would you think about?
Matt: Sex.

what makes canada so cool?

oooooh canada. been there once on the longest road trip of my life.

some interesting facts:
-smarties, crispy crunch, coffee crisp and apple pie are products from canada.
-baseball, hockey and basketball are canadian inventions.
-they invented ski-doos, jet-skis, velcro, insulin, penicillin, zambonis and short wave radios that save countless lives each year
-they invented Superman
-the handles on their beer cases are big enough to fit your hands with mitts on
-botox was invented by canadian women
-the word cyberspace was coined by canadian writer william gibson

not to mention it's birthplace to:

BUT the coolest thing about canada: its where loLA's at. la, things happen for a reason. mr. brightside will prevail for now. believe me when i say canada is lucky right now. well ya know what i mean. keep ya head up. just remember that when life hands you lemons, you paint that shit GOLD. i just miss ya girl. plain & simple. for now, just enjoy the LO-ve. hahaha. get it? cafe primo will be waiting for us. i foresee a canadian roadtrip soon. hahaha.

because weekendz were made for fun...

jumping music, swift DJ's

smoke machines and laser rays
look out weekend cause, here we come
because weekends were, werrrre

weekend came and gone. my camera, i mean carol's camera was on hand to witness the festivities.

jacko's bday celebracion.
this sexy girl, love her to death. she's a champ & can party like no other. hope all your bday wishes come true & then some.....in bed. hahahhahaha.

[pixxx]

ethel's RN graduation.

you did it girl. all your hard work paid off. so proud. i dont know anyone more deserving. now comes the hard part, but si se puede. remember the light @ the end of the tunnel & tattoo time.

[pixxx]

BUT

not only did i get to spend the weekend w/my girls but i found my SB. hahaha. i swear we didn't plan it out. its destiny or some shit like that. who knew? love ya xtal. it just shows we have

good

great taste.
ps. we went straight to photomakers after, NOT.

btw

congrats heath. best supporting actor, not too shabby. much well-deserved recognition. you will never be forgotten. THE DARK KNIGHT may have put you on the global map, but you caught my eye w/10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU & i never looked back. we still miss ya.

old schooled

i was at my grandparents house (my old house) the other day. there we were just chillin w/my g-folk & the one hot topic that we always talk about are the LA LAKERS. hahaha. i kid you not. my grandpa, like any other older filipino is a laker lover, its like in the blood or something. so we talk about the all-star game, kobe this, shaQ that, kobe & shaQ are married & the next thing that came outta my gramps' mouth was so surreal. he turns to us & says, "did YOU know that those man dancin w/shaquille are pilipino???" hahahaha. i was like wtfaack. i turned to my sister & we gave each other that, "wow, our g-pa's been takin a sip from the cool punch-look" & then burst into stomach hurting/deep lunged laughter. i replied, "where did you hear that from?" he said, "oh, i heard, i know." oooh shit. he fuckin knows whaz up. "jaba baba?" he said, trying to keep on this cool streak. fuckin JABBAWOCKEEZ. you know you've made it when my grandpa knows you. can you believe that? i was schooled by my gramps. i know he secretly watches america's best dance crew, i wonder who he's going for? betcha he's a BEAT FREAK-er. hahaha. all love gramps. i look forward to what else he can teach me.

in case you forgot, fuckin funny. shaQ's gots some moves though.

HerFavoriteColo(u)r

"the making of a great compilation tape, like breaking up, is hard to do and takes ages longer than it might seem. you gotta kick off with a killer, to grab attention. then you got to take it up a notch, but you don't wanna blow your wad, so then you got to cool it off a notch. there are a lot of rules. anyway... i've started to make a tape... in my head... for laura. full of stuff she likes. full of stuff that makes her happy. for the first time i can sort of see how that is done."

-Rob Gordon

someone said mixtapes are the new albums. & this mixtape is giving me an eargasm. im really diggin it. HerFavoriteColo(u)r is the latest project recently dropped by Blu. if you havent heard of Blu, now you have. he's a west coast mc making his presence known. he put this mixtape together infusing a sort of jazz feel w/a twist on spoken word, in the form of intertwining movie quotes over the music (lines from Closer, Buffalo 66 & Paris Je'Taime to name a few). smooth beats & a smooth flow. i'll stop talking him up now & let his lyrical style win you over. i feel like making a mixtape now. old school style w/my 2 deck cassette player. this keeps me company on my solo drives.

on the daily...

before i become a hermit today, lookie at my horoscope, very amusing i must say. i know, i know what you're thinking. do i have an ability to charm today? but more importantly, taurus' hollaaaaa. hahahahaha. naahhh, have no time for nonsense these days. im really banking on those lucky numbers though. shit can i distract myself more? no, ima be good today because i know what distractions are coming up. my head is in the game. unusual chance encounter my ass. i ponder though. "pinky, are you pondering what im pondering?" i will be that much more wiser when we meet again.

say-it-aint-so

lets peruse the essentials of cool
a brief study of the things instrumental to YOU...

THE ROOTS NEW GIG = LATE NIGHT W/JIMMY FALLON

ok so check it, as i was perusing the web, came across this little find: one of the best bands in hip-hop/music is set to be the in-house band for "Late Night w/Jimmy Fallon." who you ask? THE ROOTS!! that's who. ya i know, im a little bit late but watevs. i was like whaaaaa? thats dope. i know some of you may think they selling out, but in light of this shitty financial crisis, this gig is gonna save their asses. +they get to stay home, make bank, meet celebrities, chill w/Jimmy Fallon on a regular basis, hone their craft w/more studio time & not to mention perform w/a myriad of musical acts from Jay-Z to Tony Bennett. the pros soooo outweigh the cons. Fallon has given his stamp of approval repeatedly claiming to have "the greatest band in late-night." that goes w/o saying hands down. im that much more excited to see how Jimmy will do, Conan gots some big shoes to fill. i hope all the white folk are ready to see hip-hop on a regular basis. obama wasnt kidding bout change happening, hahaha. but move over paul shaffer & kevin eubanks, THE ROOTS are the new kids on the block. now ya know. read more ROOTS

a little taste to get ya started. love this song, probly my favorite of theirs. i look forward to my late nights.

jackSTAR

happy fuckin bday holmes. this one's your day. this girl is one of the downest girls i know. how down? soooo down. there's never ever a dull moment when we together. horror stories & all, she always has something funny/blunt/inappropriate to say. the random shit that comes outta her mouth is priceless. always on point. love ya bitch. my picture whore & loyal barhopper-er. booze & crushes are our other fixtures holding it down. you know how we do. jacko, you fuckin bright up my life. always good laughs & good times.

happy birday girl.
hope you loved the red velvet cupcakes.
btw your ass aint old, yous a pretty young thang.
luv ya mucho.

words of wisdom

quitters never win & my mama didnt raise no quitter.

even when the condition is critical,
when the livin is miserable

your position is pivotal,
i ain't bullshittin you

new week. new day. its a monday/rainy day combo but im just pumped. im ready to be distracted & trust me thats a good thang. real good thang. i had a convo w/a stranger yesterday. it was nice, delightful actually. i was at bn & the person next to me happened to glance at my reading material & noticed what i was studying for. at first i thought they were nosy lookin at my shit but thank god it wasnt a creep. we engaged in the friendly "hi's & hello's," as i sharpened my small talk skills. im pretty good at small talk. aniwais, it was pleasant & made me feel good about myself. thank you stranger, you gave me the biggest boost. i wish you well wherever you at.

lets get it on

i've been really tryin', baby
tryin' to hold back this feeling for so long
and if you feel like I feel, baby
then, c'mon, oh, c'mon
let's get it on
ah, baby, let's get it on

hahaha. liked that?
happy vday. get it on tonight. as for me, i will be gettin it on w/saunders. ya we've been having this love hate relationship. but saunders is all i need to get by. no time like the present to show some love. but who knows if i'll get the itch & change my mind. love is for lovers today. we'll see wats up.

i didnt forget

...the bday visual aids

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD.

aka. ben, benigno, bong.

i couldnt find another pix. hahahaha. back in the daaaaay. my pops & baby cinz.
btw his stache is still goin strong, signature status now. have a good one pops, this will be your year.

&

a very special shout out to my girl angeline

hope you had a good one, in fact i kno you did. i know you gots your HAPPY ENDING & them some. luv ya angelini.



because i couldnt resist but:
happy endings are stories that havent finished yet.

if worse comes to worse, keep this on the hush

ok ok i deleted it. so sue me.

its friday the 13th.
its my dad's bday.
its angeline's bday.
its vday eve.
its raining its pouring the old man is snoring.
& too bad the rain has to ruin this LOVE-ly weekend. gosh too fuckin bad. i joke. jus as long as you have that special someone it should be all good. im happy for those luva luvas. i am. for all my single babies, one day will not kill us. i dont know why everyone has to be in such a huff about this vday shit. it almost got to me. ALMOST. but my moment of sanity reached me and helped EDIT some shit. as my boy kanye says, n n now that that that dont kill me, can only make me stronger. grab life by the balls man, like in DODGEBALL. haha. get yours, im gonna get mines. thx dan, u da man. yous was very "sincere" ya liked the shoutout. fools rush in baby, foooooollllllsssss.

“Your life is defined by its opportunities… even the ones you miss.”
—Benjamin Button

dirty little secret

i will never use this word the same way again....




one of the good reads i've had in a long time, if i do say so myself. i would put the link but i wanted to make it easier. this is something that resonates to everyone in this digital camera crazy & flickr frenzy world. here's a dirty lil sssssseeeecret.


[click here] if you're too lazy to read and wanna listen to the audio

HOW TO LOOK AMAZING IN PHOTOGRAPHS

By Amanda Maxwell

Sometimes the world lets me in on its secrets. Not its important secrets, just its special little ones. The kind of secrets that help me to uphold a wonderful illusion of cleverness in the eyes of my friends and family.

For example, I know how to look amazing in photographs.

A little while ago I took a trip on an airplane. Sitting next to me on the airplane was a girl with long hair and curled eyelashes. She was reading a glossy magazine.

“Hey,” she said.

“Hi,” I said.

“Do you want to read this magazine?” she asked. “I’ve finished with it.”

I was grateful for her kindness, as it wasn’t the kind of airplane with television screens on the back of every seat and I had made a bad choice of paperback in the airport news agency.

“Okay,” I said. “Thanks.”

The girl passed me the magazine.

On the cover was a photograph of Scarlett Johansson. In the photograph Scarlett looked especially amazing. I looked at her for a long time without opening the magazine, and while I looked at her, I asked myself a question that I often ask myself when I am looking at amazing photographs of beautiful ladies: How come you look that amazing?

Her hair was all everywhere, eyes looking into my eyes, mouth doing that secret thing that model mouths do. It was amazing.

I couldn’t bring myself to open that magazine; for an hour or more I just kept looking at the cover. We had hit a little bit of turbulence and the girl beside me had turned white.

“I get so scared on airplanes,” she said.

“You’ll be fine,” I said and squeezed her hand. Then I went back to looking at the cover of the magazine.

Outside the sky was dark and empty. When the turbulence had settled down, the air hostesses came out with wine and lemonade. And then an eerie thing happened: I heard a sound. Not an airplane sound or the sound of a glass being dropped, but something like a whisper. It was coming from somewhere very close to me. I looked at the girl beside me. She was asleep. I heard it again.

“Shhh,” it said.

When I looked down I realized a very scary thing. The sound was coming from the glossy magazine in my lap. I picked the magazine up carefully and very slowly put my ears to Scarlett Johansson’s lips. And this is what I heard:

“Dooooouuuche.”

Just that single word.

“Did you say ‘douche’?” I whispered in Scarlett’s ear, but the sound was gone.

I drank my glass of wine in one mouthful. I wondered if this was what it was like to lose your mind.

Douche: a shower in French; not a shower in English.

I thought about an episode of Oprah that I’d seen a few years earlier. Oprah had been interviewing a gorgeous gynecologist who had just written a book on all things lady. The gynecologist was smiling and sharing fabulous feminine tips, more of which could be found in the book if you bought it. Suddenly, Oprah stood up and said, “You hear that, ladies? Don’t douche!”

And the crowd went wild. They joined her in a chorus of “Don’t douche, don’t douche, don’t douche.” Fists punching the air.

But on the airplane that day the memory seemed too good to be true and I couldn’t guarantee that I hadn’t made it up. Things were very strange.

The girl next to me was awake now and looked much better.

“Thanks for lending me the magazine,” I said and gave it back to her.

“You’re welcome,” she said. “Great cover isn’t it?”

“It is,” I said. And then I decided to be very bold. “Hey, can I ask you a question?”

“Shoot,” she said.

I lowered my voice to a whisper. “Well, it’s a bit of a personal question, but, you see, I’m doing some research for a health magazine and I wondered. Do you, um… douche?”

She looked at me in a sideways way and didn’t say anything. The photograph of Scarlett stared out at me from her seat pocket.

“Sorry,” I said. “Let’s pretend I never asked you that.”

“Okay,” she said, still looking at me in that sideways way.

“Okay,” I said. I pulled my eye mask on in a hurry and faked sleep. This is what it is like to lose your mind, I told myself.

Douche: a shower in French; not a shower in English.

I guess I drifted off for a while then, because the next thing I knew the girl was tapping me on the shoulder. I pulled off my mask and looked at her.

“I do,” she said quietly. “I mean, I have. I mean, I do sometimes.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, but only with Diet Coke after we, you know, do it.”

“We?”

“Yeah, dudes.”

“Diet Coke?”

“Yeah, so I don’t get pregnant. It kills sperm.”

In my head I said this to myself: The girl with long hair douches with Diet Coke after she does it with dudes so she doesn’t get pregnant.

“Thanks for sharing that with me,” I said.

“That’s okay,” she said.

“Will you excuse me?” I asked.

“Sure,” she said.

In the airplane bathroom I splashed cold water on my face and dried it off with a paper towel. I looked in the mirror and noticed that I had airplane hair. Oh well, I thought. My eyes were bloodshot too. Never mind. I tried out Scarlett’s pose, a sleepy-eyed pout, but couldn’t get the lips right. My pucker was more like a dog’s bum. “Things are very strange,” I mouthed, still watching myself in the mirror. “I think a glossy magazine just spoke to me, and all it said was the word ‘douche.’”

And that was IT. That was the epiphany. That was my moment of clarity. The big breakthrough. Eureka.

I said it again, “Douche,” and as the word took shape in my mouth my expression became the expression of a model. I had the perfect pout. Then it was gone. I tried whispering this time. “Douche.” Gorgeous. And again. “Douche.” Amazing. Now I had the secret. Never again would I say “cheese” for the camera.

When I got back to my seat the girl next to me gave me a conspiratorial look. She leaned over.

“You were gone a long time,” she said. “Were you, um, you know, in there?”

“Sort of,” I said. And with my newfound peace of mind, I let myself fall into a deep sleep.

When we finally touched down I was the third person off the plane. I remembered there being a photo booth in the airport terminals and bypassed the luggage carousel to look for it. When I found it, I ducked in, whispered the d-word four times for the camera, and found the results to be very pleasing. I looked amazing.

With the strip of pictures in my pocket and a lovely feeling inside, I made my way back to pick up my bags. I didn’t get far, though, before I passed a newsstand and stopped dead. On the rack before me there were thirty Scarletts midway through saying “douche” for the camera. Sophie Dahl was saying it. J. Lo was saying it. Even Gael García Bernal was douching. I felt myself blush and looked around to see if anyone else was seeing what I was seeing. There were people all around me, hurrying to and from airplanes, pulling luggage and children along with them. And not one of them seemed to notice.

And not one of them looked amazing.


dooouuuuuuccchhhhee. haha i kno all y'all gonna be sayin that now instead of cheeeeeese. thank you & you're welcome.