water balloon fighters, low riders & east siders

its the last day of april & im feenin for summer. guess ya know whats in my head space. maybe because ima summer baby. summer heat is a bitch but summatime & the livins EZ. the beach, vacays, breezies, long-ass days, on & on & on & on. oh & my bday! a while back someone, knowing full well that my bday is in august, once told me, "august is such a bad luck month"....i was like wtf bitch? she was just a hater. august is the shit. aniwais, maybe im feenin for summer so much cuz of this song. i fuckin love this song. everytime i hear it, it hits the spot. fo realz. like right from the get go when that chick is singing, ahhhh summertime, that's the shit right there. i heard this song on my shuffle last weekend and everyone in the car was all, "oh shit, that's the jam right there." hahaha. well something like dat. it just puts me in the best mood where you're super care free for about the 4:00 minute duration of the song. right? who's w/me on that one? i have 2 favorite summer songs & this is MOS DEF one of them. ok, i even bought the cassette tape & made mixtapes & shit. summer please come like now.

i was gonna just post the song but thought you might enjoy the video.
the best summer anthem:

why do we do what we do when we do what we do hangin out late w/no curfew?

happiness, you could model it

chew on that.

like everyone else in this rat race, i wanna be happy. honest & simple. to be exactly happy that's another thang. "exact" happiness is a whole other level that i have yet to reach but i know ima get there, one day. aniwais, yeezy tells me that there are 2 KEYS 2 HAPPINESS. the 1st key: being able to tolerate the things that make you unhappy. & the 2nd key: being able to change the things to make you happy. now if you have a low tolerance and don't have the ability to create change then there's a good chance you'll be unhappy. worrrddddd. i deserve to be happy right? we all do. even though life loooves to hand me lemons, i cant focus on bad shit. ima work on those keys. i almost lost the will to write but that was fuckin pushin it. what the hell was i thinkin? dummmb. i just wasnt feelin it for a while. u know how that is: u get all numb about things & cant write for shit. that's all said & done now. but the biggest THANK YOU to all my homies who have been there for me all the way. i know i sucked being flaky & almost hermit status, but you guys knew what was up. thanx for helping me get by. i fuckin love you guys forever & ever for that. ok kids time to get over all the crappy shtuff & paint shit GOLD.

dont worry, be =)

painting makes me happy.


& my god-daughter makes me the happiest.

hey gurl ey

happy birfday to my girl, ethel.
thank you so much for always being there. you're the bestest bestest. ima better person just for knowing you girl, i mean it. dont know what i would do w/o you. hope had a good one & many many more to come. all love girl.

do or die?

today is the day.

i will:

this time i mean it.
i've dusted myself off,
i got jude & all the <3 in the world.
its fucking on.

xtal love

happy birhday xtal.

christal or xtal affectionately holds the title of the "friend i've known the longest," since kindergarten. that's a long ass time [19 years? mas o menos] fuck i know. i member for my debut [ya i had one, which i totally regret] she was one of my 18 treasures and gave me a watch symbolic of how our friendship "stood the test of time." awwwww. it was sweet though. i always have the best gyrl times w/you. have a good one babygirl. see ya when you get back from your euro vacay. happy happy bday!!

bebot bebot

pinay pride....
i got caught up in the blogosphere and spotted this.
someone got there nails did: bebot edition.



QUESTION: would you?

FULL house

whatever happened to predictability?

predictability is a bitch. thats wassup. everywhere i look...there's a heart? a hand to hold on to..... hahaha. you know i had to. BUT lately my life kinda sorta feels like FULL house. NOOOOT. well minus uncle jesse & his mullet, no rippers, no "you got it dudes," no "have mercy!!," no "how rudes," no "cut-it-outs" w/joey doing those corny hand gestures & danny tanner aint giving us a lesson in morality (ya know when they play that instrumental touchy feely music @ the end of every episode). hahahaha. but its just funny when u think about it. like why the fuck am i comparing my life to a sitcom? becuz you have to laugh off life, thats why. in so many words, shit kinda hit the fan. but you just have to make do; in my case, it's making do w/familiar faces en mi casa. it could be way worse right? at first it was interesting, then comical & took some time to get used to. but actually, i'll admit that the situation is kinda comforting (maybe a m&m's worth, tho). personal space may be a little bit harder to find but home is where your heart is. & my <3 is bunking w/carol. she said that one day we would have a good hard laugh about this; we we're "older." but what can you do? such is life. i have nooooo complaints tho [well you know what i mean]. miss positive tells me that this was a blessing in disguise if you want the silver lining. i guess i believe this because despite all the chaos plus being the biggest distraction to date, i've managed to see it as my biggest motivation. gotsta keep on keepin on. the words, "it was meant to be" seem fitting right now. ANIWAIS, on a way lighter note, i fucking loved this show. who the hell didnt? member T.G.I.F on ch.7? that was the shit right there. miss that. but i wanted to share this wit cha. [i want to make clear that i did not make this]. but ya, i thought fo sho mk+a would be top dog, check out tito jesse though. the mullet reigns supreme. so so zexy.

big sis

HAPPY BIRHDAY CHERYL!!!!

(aka: manang, big-C, che, churro, shay, crumbs, calves, shirley, toots....)
& the list goes on & on & on & on, you kno i wont stop

but ya the big 2-_??? i wont do you like that. i'll give you some mystery. hahahaha. big sis, wink wink. hahahaha. & you like blue so here ya go... ok well manang, today is your big badass bday. look @ this old pix of you posin... top fuckin model right there, who knew? but i really like this pix of you. thats right after you graduated from your FRO status or before? your hair was always moody. :) you should really get your hair cut like that. hahaha. aniwais, it just brings me back in the day. when we used to live in the "apartment" and i would copy everythang you would do, follow you everywhere you went and even went to school w/you when i was 4? wasnt i so annoying??? but i know you loved it. ooooh cheryl we've come alooooong way but i still look up to you not only because you're an inch or 2 taller than me but because you're just too cool for words. ahhh. no no, if it makes you feel better you're the bestest "manang" ever. i mean that. tear. ever since you threatened me to never use that term of endearment ever again, manang will always = cheryl in my book. i really do look up to you though. i know i could get under you're skin and always push your buttons but you know it's allllll LOVE. but my life wouldn't be the same without the many faces of cheryl. too many to count. here's another one before you go. [us @ disneyland] you're bestest big sis ever cuz you's my only big sis. love yaaaaaaa.



ps. i hope you're over feeling "old." that just means you're getting wiser & cooooooler.
hahahahahahhahaa.
like a fine wine.
all that matters is that you're all <3.but, this is what carol & me have been slaving away over all day. ok ok, more carol cuz she loves you so much. but we couldnt resist because we know you're obsession/love for HELLO KITTY so we know you'll appreciate this. i know it aint perfect but its homemade we wanted to make it speshuuuullll (ya i had to spell it likes that), feel the love, manang. feel the love.
HAPPY BIRHDAY!!!


"if that doesnt scream, "I LOVE MY SISTER!!!!" i dont know what will?" -carol
(after admiring & looking at the hello pussy "masterpiece" cake)


[pixxx]

whatta man

whatta man, whatta man, whatta mighty good man.... [yesss he is]

i had that album. salt n pepa n spin, cant forget spin. aniwais, T.I.'s road to redemption has begun, booooo fuckin hoo, one year & one day, aint no thing butta... anyhoo, not only is this pretty boy baby-daddy to 6 [ya i kno 6!!, he has to count his kids using both hands], but he keeps it real w/his baby mama. he's so sweet to her. i kno she aint all fine, maybe a "lil bit" botoxed up even, but he def doesnt judge a book by its cover. i guess he goes for "personality?" but that just makes him hotter. he's so cute here gettin all shy....oh T.I. i adore you.





a perfect way to start off my day....


ps. i kinda sorta unknowningly put my foot in my mouth the other day and i feel bad about it, i soooo didnt mean it the way it came out. i partly blame it on the aaaaaa ________. i dont kno why i still feel horrible about it. ok i just wanted to put it out there.

untitled

go white boy.

cant.
not.
look.

how does it feeeeeel?



.

hahahahahahahahahaha. someone's got balls.
an inch lower & we would've sneaked a peek

its april, foo

ok ok so i didnt wanna let the cat outta the bag but...im taking my test today. scared as fuck, but im being positivo.


APRIL FUCKING FOOLS....

hahahahahhahha. sha-right. dont think so. did i get cha? good huh. i know lame. i just wanted to share a good laugh. but im so not takin it today. soon though, real reeeeal soon.

fyi: consistency is key.



oh & this is my POPular song of the moment [dont judge me]


"hear my words for their worth
aint just trynna get in yo clothes
okay im lyin, but damn you fine & uhm.."

hahahahaha. i know its old but im thisclose to downloading it. when im not lazy. it puts me in a good mood for some reason. mainstream i know, i know. dont be hatin...radio killllllla...

last nite, she said:

"oh baby i feel so down..."

the aftermath of lastnite....NOT

last nite was carols annual pool partay; the poolhouse delivered again except for that dumb rent-a-cop but i cant hate cuz he's just doing his job & im tryna be his friend so for next time...ya know? i discovered my etoh tolerance was higher than i thought [good for me], i learned that boys have feelings too, weird wrinkly old dudes in shiny track suits shouldnt stay up past their bedtime, the cupcake masterpiece to feed an army was a hit and lots of "leftovers" & if ya didnt get it, thats code for boooooze....you know what that means. i'll let ya know when & where. hahahaha. you know it. aniwais, bday girl got drunk and i was just happy to catch up w/some good people. check & check. it was fun. i almost forgot that feeling, ALMOST. btw the "yan-man's" love for the SHAM WOW was too fuckin funny: it was those you-had-to-be-there type of moments. if yous wasnt there you missed out, be there next time. i jacked pix from jacko cuz ya know my girl is lightning fast when it comes to that shizz. i'll add more when im not lazy.

[pixxx]

all falls down

and she be dealing with some issues that you can't believe
single black female addicted to retail...

ok ok blog #2 in one day. people watching at the library aint cutting it & my nursing notes are starting to look like little wavy indistinctive lines. BUT, some stranger just came up to me and asked to take a video of me studying....um fucking awkward. first of all, i dont go to school here [i used to but im here because im waiting for my sis] & second of all its just weird. i said..."uhhhh." he was all like, "you just looked really studious & dont worry this is for the school's study/learning video" or some bullshit like that. yaaaa right, suuuurrre buddy. i was like duh its the fucking library that's what you're supposed to be doing, not the local mall/bar/what-have-you. but i just let him because i didnt want to make a scene in the library plus he was already filming. imagine spielberg coming up to you while you're studying except the exact opposite ok; this guy was black dude w/a semi-professional looking camera he probly bought from costco. he went from over the shoulder to full frontal view. i was trying to keep a straight face, trying to pretend to write notes but all i was typing was a bunch of nothing that looked like this: sdhpoi ohuawe weeiweb meds wjsf werjha sker. i was all nervous. hahahahahaha. who the fuck does that??? i better not see this video somewhere on YouTube w/someone's weird voice dubbed over my shot. ughhh. watch. what the hell did i get myself into?? im just nice, too nice. that was creepy. im getting shivers now. hahahaha. straight up stalker status i had to share.

but what you're really supposed to be getting from this blog was a phone convo that went like this & i felt compelled to share. although, the stalker incident is soooo trumping this..this kinda helps me deal w/the current status quo.

"i want you to hit me as HARD as you can"

this is your life and it's ending one minute at a time...

these 2 white boys. "white" fuckin hott. literally. hahaha. the victims of my distraction. anything to take away from the "real world." hahaha. as if my life is a reality show. NOT. if it was then i would be in the confessional right now venting my ass off. but that's not my style. i have a tendency to suppress things til no end. thats how i roll. its just easier that way, i dont like people up in my biznatch. my heart is no where near my sleeve. aniwais, my family ties are fucking pulling at me right now and this unexpected situation is forcing me to push my test date back. big surprise. basically, we're in a lurch. a crappy shithole kind of a lurch. you get the picture... my motha keeps saying in so many words that the passing of my test will be the remedy/cure-all/salvation to our problems. but hey NO PRESSURE though. geeeeez. thx mom. i'll just stroll right in save the day. no problem. hahahaha. but im trying to digest the current crisis mode my family is in while trying to master all the nursing content that can possibly fit in my brain. no biggie tho. ya right, it sure aint easy. but i apologize, friends if i've been M.I.A. but that'll just be something temporary. you know me. just pray for my test. now dont worry i wont pull a cindy and tell only one person hoping it wont get out cuz im trying to be "mysterious". oh wait that shit already happened. hahaha. that was my bad, kinda. shoulda known, i blame it on the feeling, blaaaaah; and what! i said it. how did i know that it was gonna go down like that. but that was just funny actually. all i can do is laugh that shit off. ok ok back to the grind. saturday will be a night. i'll reserve the fun til then. but i'll take on the distraction with these even zexier boyz ;)

break me off a piece of that....

pls look at rudd's chest hair. so manly...& GROSS. love em tho.

kid seester

someone's all growns up now....

happy 20th birrrrday, sill.

dear ading carol,

hahahahaha. you know we dont say that shit, imagine... but i shall use purple since its your favorite color. i know i do too much. anything for you. aniwais, you aint a teen no more. but i know you'll milk your age card for all its worth since you're the baby of the family. haha. if it makes you feel better you're the oldest 20 y/o i know. big 2-0. time fucking flies. doesnt it feel like yesterday we would torture each other, annoy each other to no end and get in stupid fights? oh wait a minute. that really was yesterday. hahahahahahaha. nooo, our fights arent that stupid. you just bring out the kid in me. i love how our family gets "annoyed" w/our deep lunged laughter and our inside jokes, you know how we do. as g-ma says, we're frick & frack. [i'll take frick]. but ya on the real, im glad we the bff's we are today. awwww. [tear] ya know what i mean. you're the one person who knows me best but can still keep it real w/me when i need it. you tell me how it is & you're always there at the drop of my beanie without fail. i know i throw around the word robot but i know you're all heart. ok girl [haha like that] hope you live it up today as you should. cupcakes will be in abundance this week you'll probly shit one out & the bday love will never get old. let the good things happen to you, ooook?? i hope this bday blog sufficed. cuz i know you're reading this instead of listening to your lecture. bad-ass. i did my best. cuz you's the best. love ya seester. too too much. dont know what i would do without you fo realz.

luv,
ate cinz

[what if you actually called me that? awkward...]

this baby will be waiting for you at home.


ps. im laughing right now because im tapping away writing this birday masterpiece and you are right in front me, knocked out, roommie. you have noooo idea. hahaha suckaaaa. i love it.









pps. remember this convo???

carol: someone's birthday is coming up.
g-ma: oh ya, wednesday right?? i know your birthday is wednesday.
carol: grandma, it's tuesday, march 24th!!! tuesday..... 5 days before your bday.
g-ma: so where we gonna eat?

hahahahahahahah.
gotta love her.

ok the end.
happy 20th birday.
i had too much fun w/this blog.
dunno if you could tell?