tuesdays = mawndays

my work week starts today. not bad eh. im diggin it, this fucking storm i aint. im starting to love tuesdays. not only because my work week seems to go by quicker BUT its DPL nights. for those of you who aint cool like dat, DPL = da poetry lounge. i love love love it. im no poet or anything but its pretty powerful, motivating and uplifting; jus ordinary people doin they thang. beauty is definitely in the ear of the beholder....


this one is one of my favoritist

but this one leaves me in awe, like you know how somethings make the hair on the back of your neck stand up but in a good way, sends me the shivers



check it out yo:
http://www.dapoetrylounge.com/about.html

see you there?

dancing in the rain

oh blu.....

the rain is here and im not as happy as i am when its raining. i love the rain but it aint doin it for me yet. i used to take solace in the rain... i dont know. i feel like gettin some pho. pho always makes me feel better. i'll get over it, ok im over it now.

training daze

even though i was employed all the way back in novemba, i have my official technician training for the next 2 days. i know its retarded but its this big bad corporation and thats just the way it works. so yes even though i've been treating all these patients all by my bad self, i still have to go through some official training. i hope it aint bad. in other work related news, yesterday the nurse trainer came in for a "pop-up" audit. fuck me, i know! that shit was scary. i come into work and the first thing that happens is that she wants to come in while im giving a treatment and observe my performance, critiquing my technique & shit. i was gonna shit a brick cuz she could write me up for anything. under pressure mang. needless to say i did aight. i hope. gotsta keep grindin either way.

i need a resolution

pretty much,
the goal of 2010:


ok so since its the new years and all that bullshit. resolutions are def in order. i dont necessarily believe in resolutions as i said last year but the notion is always motivating. whatever floats your boat man. aniwais, in the grand tradition of bettering oneself i've come up with a list of my very own thangs to resolve:

-blog waaaay much more.

i guess i've been neglecting you because i;ve been busy. ok scratch that, its just a lame excuse. along with my internet is crappy another lame one, i could blog from any functioning computer. i guess i was just suffering a huge case of writers block = my lazy ass didnt feel like it. & plus u know how sometimes you write/post just in case you think someone is reading.....yeah im so over that. but no i really blogged for numba 1 & me only. & now that my life seems to goin in a very favorable direction im compelled to blog more. im happy my creative juices are flowing again........ ima try my bestest bestest keep this cypher rollinnn

-get to my lbs goal

ok so not to toot my own horn but i've done a dramatic lbs. loss before and i could do it again. oh ok toot toot! i did it before i could do it again. ya im puttin myself on blast. "i guess its just water & EXLAX til prom" hahahaha. but seriously i really wanna lose 3 lbs.

-paint more


i miss painting

-read more

im determined. im not a reader but i promised myself to read more stimulating material.

-take more pictures


which means i would have to buy my own camera first but i will.

-relearn to play the piano

i used to dread piano lessons, maybe because my teacher was some annoying bitch or maybe because my mom would force me to practice.....i wasnt bad at playing, not bad at all. but i stopped playing, now i think i've forgotten. i really wanna get into again.

-travel

i woulda put "MORE" but i've been no where lately. i wanna travel since i have the funds somewhat i have nothing else to hold me back. which reminds me i need to renew the passport pronto.

-stick with my gut

i have the worst case of 2nd guessing myself. my indecisiveness is my curse. its just this twitch i have where i make a decision and 2nd guess it like a minute later. & about stupid shit. i get too tripped up & i hate that. i promise to get better. i just got to go with the flow.....

-be open & let the guard down


my guard is so UP that its really hard to relinquish that control.

-stay positivo



dude u already know.....

-indoor skydive

got the hook up, i need to take advantage before the opportunity aint there no mo.

-stop smoking

ok cmon like thats gonna happen. but fo reals to cut back more? like not so much on the weekdays. i know that was laughable but it was a good notion. maybe i should invest in that tobacco-less ciggy thing that cost$$ a lot, but then again my lungs/health is priceless.

-basically make o ten a better year than o nine.



ok so much to my hesitation to post up a list, i've decided to be OPEN and put it all out there and challenge myself. im sure this list will get longer with me crossing out things slowly but surely.

nouveau

it's 2010. cant believe it either. goodbye to all the crap that we had to deal with in 09: the disappointments, the failures, the shoulda, coulda, wouldas & hello to new beginnings, successes, & goodtimes only. the new year just has this effect on people to RESOLVE to be a better person be it losing some lbs, kicking the habit to cutting out the bullshit in your life and being positive. it's the secret mang, im telling you. positivity is my anthem this year. i brought in the new year with good people & good vibes. here's hoping my 2010 will be filled with the dopest dope ever.

someday @ christmas...

...men will be boys

christmas 2009 has officially come to an end. this year was waaaaay better probly one of the best in years. it could pretty much be summed up with famlay & friends & kris kringles & white elephants. i loved it. i already got what i wanted way before christmas so everything else was gravy baby. my presents were dopeness though. best one so far was my disneyland annual pass!!! im sooooo excited for that one. thanks carol & daryll. the day was just delightful. im happier this year than last year, thats fo sho. feel so blessed you dont even know. i look forward to next years already because i know it can only go UP from here. i sound so happy, who am i?? hahaha. such a vast improvement. feliz navidad homies. hope yours was as good as mines.

evvvvvvvvvryday im hustlin.....

except sundaze.

oh em gee. its been so long. too long. i've missed you, more than you'll ever know. but life has been it. i said before it will happen & everythang did. well almost everything. i think we should play ketchup....

first off halloween was cwazy. i love halloween. right up there w/xmas. i was cleo, fafi, & a hippie. dopeness. & a lil distraction is always delightful. whatta man =)

next i finally got hired!! yessir. u heard it right. i seemed to go on 1097648273640 interviews, to jobs that i didnt even really want. but i was desperate; work is work. the silver lining was that i was able to build my confidence & bullshit like that. u really have to market yourself as cheesy as that sounds. fo real. the way you sell yourself: your appearance, your resume, your demeanor, your ability to kiss ass...it all matters. oh & the connections. its not what you know, its who you know. trust. i was lucky enough to get hired onto not only 1 good job but 2 worthy jobs. ima nurse you would think it would be easy, but not so my friends. its hard out there for a pimp & everybody else. i worked hard, stayed positive and thrived on every opportunity i could. & all that hard work manifested for me. all i can is that im so grateful, nothing more. oh maybe a lil more. i love my jobs. i work @ a laser center. laser HAIR removal that is. (thx xtal) my girl hooked it up and now i work w/the best nurses ever. such a different aspect of nursing; i love it. youre not dealing w/sick people. i feel i'll be using my minor in psychology more..... & the other job is @ LAX giving h1n1 vaccine shots. tight right? i'll be working in actual terminals treating employees and travelers. im excited for that one. my schedule is good for now. im the night nurse & i work everyday except sundays. not bad, not bad.

thanksgiving was nice. famlay party hopped. attempted to make pumpkin cheesecake for the first time & it was a hit. no black friday shopping cuz i had trabajo. needless to say but THANKFUL for everythang.

ooooh before i forget i have my own room! yaaaaayuuh. i converted the loft upstairs to my own room. its kinda hard to explain if you dont know my house. upstairs theres a lil loft that we used as the tv room; all but 2 walls. can u even picture this weird description? but if not, i got room dividers and made everything in the space my owns. i looooooove decorating. so its still in the process but im so much more happier now.

as of late, sometimes when im driving in the car by myself i stop & ponder & realize that my life is way better than it was a year ago; maybe even 6 months ago. life is good; it could always be better. but im happy i guess.


i will add pictures soon. ima working girl now so time is precious. ima go wrap gifts and watch home alone now. i'll be bawk. i promise.

BE

i've been so out of it. i feel like shit because the cold that has infiltrated this house has finally got me. its not cute; breathing outta your mouth cuz your nose is so clogged making your lips all chapped (i really hate that). but despite my trivial complaints i had a really good weekend =) like those weekends where you have no expectations whatsoever but end up having "the best fucking times of my entire fucking life" type thing. its like we all never skipped a beat.... so grateful to say the least. i've also been tryin to take life into my own hands and make things happen instead of complaining & waiting, i moved into the loft & im soooooo happy. the one thing i will truly take from this whole situation is that you should never take anything for granted; whether it be people or living space. its the truth. u really dont know what u got til its gone.

ANIWAIS, i havent blogged in a long ass time....i miss you blog. i'll be showin you some more love soon. i cant believe its novemba already. time fucking flies....somehow i thought about my life a year ago. things were different thats fo sho. sorry i couldnt help but. more about that later. but my medication is starting to kick in, ima go knock out now. but yay cuz i get to spend quality time w/my goddaughter lil k & another interview tomorrow....i will get this job. goodnight.

no fuck ups

anotha day, anotha interview.....
this recession is killing me larry! give a sista a break. i've been on a good couple of interviews & i must say im getting progressively better. sharp PROfessional attire; CHECK. strong handshake & eye contact; CHECK. kiss-ass attitude; CHECK. no one is biting. i almost questioned if i was doing something wrong...but i soon figured out the one thing i lack is EXPERIENCE. give me a chance & i'll give you experience. gotta keep my head up & hope i dont fuck this up. in the meantime, i'll dream of how life would be once i get that job.

i get by wit a lil help from my friendsssss

VIRGO DAILY HOROSCOPE FOR OCTOBER 18, 2009:

It's the differences between you and your friends -- not the similarities -- that keep you all close, believe it or not. So embrace and respect the fact that they don't always agree with you! Sure, you may not believe those who hold different views, but you should always believe in your friends! Harmony doesn't happen when all notes are the same; it happens when different notes come together and create a beautiful sound. Love the music you and your friends make.

worddddd. i luv my friends. they are theeee best. =)

haste makes waste

sundaze are still fun daze. on the biggggest side note kids: REJECTION blows but what matters most is how you deal with it. i gotta feeling something GREATER will come my way. i know it will.

"nothing good comes easily, sometimes you've got to fight...."

mister feeeeeeeenster

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
too funny. i loved this show. i even went to a tv taping. this was good huh? i had to show u guys.

saturday, WAIT

ok so im not doin great @ updating. baaaad cindy. i'll try my bestest to keep up. i have to be a responsible adult & tend to grown up biznass thats why. but things have been goin good so far. in fact, i feel real real goood. not to the point where its nauseating good. but im really tryin to stay on that positive tip & let things happen. which is big for me right now. routinely, i would always think twice, second guess & then just settle. which was secretly miserable. but i decided i dont wanna be the reason i feel like crap so i did wat most grown ups do & sucked it up & just let go. let it all go. well most it anyways. .......in saying all this motivational stuff, i had a dope-ass weekend. ya DOPE-ASS. haha. lets see i discovered that hollywood is only a walk (a loooong walk away), a pitcher & smokes always does the trick, thirft store shopping is always fun but halloween thirft store shopping is a mission, mamamamamitas is BOMB, & HIP HOP kareoke is the new thang. it doesnt matter how ghetto a place may seem good company ALWAYS cancels that out. but i had a really good weekend w/my girls.

ok so hip hop kareoke is exactly what you're thinking when i first mentioned HIP HOP kareoke. it was tight!!! all u hiphop heads, if you are looking for a good/chill time then sharpen those MC skills cuz u gotsta bring it if you choose to hit the stage. no joke some nerdy looking lil white dude was all up on a WU-TANG joint & killed it. soooooooo if that doesnt make u come out then i dunno wat will. hahahahahahahaha. just to warn it's kinda in the ghetto meaning its really in the heart of the HIGHLAND park ghetto. good joints & jams, i promise you'll have a good time or at least be entertained. the quote of the night: "im not gonna FLOW or anything," colin. hahaha. they should really give me a cut since im sooooo pluggin this shit. its the every 2nd saturday of each month & i think theyre tryin to change the venue to somewhere? here's the link since im so nice: therhymealong.com

QUOTEWORTHY:
"Be who you are & say what you feel,
because those who mind don't matter &
for those who matter dont mind." Dr. Seuss

all of thee above

wish me luck.

do you speaka any english?

monday mornings are killers. 5am wake up calls physically hurt. ya u read that right, 5AM! i know! it hurts that much more because i dont have the whole get up early & being all chipper enjoying the morning kind of mentality. i cherish my nights. BUT i have my obligations to uphold. so instead of complaining i've turned this unpleasant thing into a very productive outlet and decided to execute my workout regimens in the mornings as well. genius, i know. im tryin to get better @ time management. aniwais, before i rambled, my point is that i've noticed i've been neglecting my blog. no bueno. so now its time for some tlc. some informative/funny shit to detract from all the deep thoughts lately. i cant help it though.

ps. i'll give credit where its due. roldy found this for me, so all props to her. oh & roldy = caROL. haha.

learn sumthin new everyday.

doesnt this remind you of RUSH HOUR, when chris tucker is being an asshole to jackie chan & says: "DO-YOU-UNDERSTAND-THE-WORDS-THAT-ARE-COMING-OUT-OF-MY-MOUTH?"

oh & im tryna stay on that positivo tip so ima try to leave a quote here & there. u know some words to live by:

"just manage your life & challenge it..." -blu