there is always hope

im sittin next to my windowsill. on my side of the bed. its cold. the night sounds peaceful & i love it.

i've been getting a funny feeling lately. not exactly a cute one but a weird one? i cant put my finger on what it is but my gut is telling me that life & all of its idiosyncrasies are unfolding. all these things i've only imagined before are actually starting to manifest & i need to take it all in wholeheartedly. its scary and exciting. i dont wanna fuck it up so im scared. its a waiting game of hits and misses. but the greater the risk the greater the reward. i still cant explain this weird funny feeling tho. its indescribable. but for now i'll stay grateful. for everything. the good & the bad. because i heard em say, people in your life are seasons and everything that happens is for a reason. i truly believe timing is everythang...

in the meantime, banksy says there is always HOPE.

jacked

simply put but harder to follow. i think #10 is a must.

here we are again. 2:50 am. my blog is my only constant @ this time of nite/morning (whichever you prefer). i seem to have a battle with falling asleep these past nights and insomnia is kickin my ass. i cant articulate right now. i have all these things i want to say but i dont want to complain anymore. i hate how i feel when i do. its so unattractive and unpleasant. so instead i will formulate my own list of life lessons:

CINDY'S LIFE LESSONS
1. Treat others the way you want to be treated; the GOLDEN rule always reigns supreme.
2. Don't talk shit; more importantly dont get caught.
3. Get used to getting used. (totally jacked from kanye but sooo true. if you're not useful you're USELESS.)
4. Have consideration for other people; rude people are so fuckin annoying.
5. Believe in yourself; confidence is key.
6. Let it go. let the bad shit go. "bag lady you goin hurt your back, draggin all those bags like that."
7. Mean what you say; real talk is powerful. words hurt more than sticks & stones.
8. Aim high. ambition is sooooooo attractive.
9. Love is inevitable. (ok i stole that one from that chick from the movie Paper Heart. i have yet to experience IT but im a believer).
10. Dont let opportunities pass you by; CARPE DIEM.
11. Try new things; the same routine gets stale.
12. Love wholeheartedly. the half-assed shit gets you no where.
13. Take a chance. you never know.
14. Have no regrets. regrets are killers.
15. Sing out loud. esp @ kareoke bars.
16. Rock your lashes. eyelashes that is. real or fake.
17. Fall 7 times get up 8. shit happens dust yourself off and try again.
18. Be happy. Do what makes you happy. Depression is exhausting.
19. Live in the moment. dont mess it up w/worrying about the past or future. "the present is a gift and i just wanna be."
20. Learn from your mistakes. Dont make the same mistake twice or thrice. "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me."
21. Practice humility. Humble pie is not the best flavor but is the best teacher.
22. Give more than you take. Generosity is contagious; shiestyness is ugly.
23. Surround yourself with positivity. positive people, positive thoughts, positive environment. good vibes = good times.
24. Always laugh out loud.
25. Take pictures. lots and lots of pictures.

kinda got carried away. i could keep going if i wanted to. but 25 for all the years i've been alive =)

summer vs autumn

FINALLY!!!

i thought i was the only person who didnt watch this movie. i was thisclose to watchin it by myself (ya thats how much i've been wanting to watch this). but easily one of my favorite movies this year. i already own the dvd, i just have to buy it when it comes out.


"next time you look back, i think you should look again..."

state of mind

screw that kanye/taylor swift drama, this shoulda been the highlight of the night. although lil mama was drinking some crazy shit & crashed the party at the end. crazy bitch this aint america's best dance crew! BUT jigga man you did it again. on point as always & kept it real. you made me have an empire state of mind;

"concrete jungle where dreams are made of...
those lights will inspire you...."

Jay-Z - New Music - More Music Videos

virgo sistah

carley my love,


happy happy birthday. happy 25th!!
girl, there are not enough words to say how much i miss you. but i wanted to let you know that absence definitely makes the heart grow fonder. not that i dont love you enough. i just wanted to wish you the bestest bestest in life cuz i know you deserve it girl. i still look back @ all of this & cant believe it but i really believe that things happen for inexplicable reasons. one day when we're old & gray we'll laugh about this. hahaha. sometimes i think that youre a phone call away & we could meet up @ the americana ;) but believe me when i say that canada is soooo lucky right now :) mark my words i will make it up there by the end of the year or sometime in winter. i promise. pinky swear. but aniwais, i hope you enjoy your day girl. miss our goodtimes, our talks, our dinners, & of course most of all you. im here if you need anything cuz i know you always got my back. love & miss ya more than you'll ever know my virgo sistah. can u believe we're 25 now? haha. oh how time fliesssss ;)

carla, ms bacon if yur nastyyyyyy

happy bday bacon!!!!
i know this pix is an oldie but a goodie. i kno i look a fool but its a cute candid of you =)
i got cha anytime girl.
i always associated september 1st w/the 1st day of school & always dreaded it, but now its a cause for celebratin your life girl. i kno that sounded soooo corny but i mean it yo. hope you have a great one cuz i know the bday love came early this year & will keep on comin :) luv ya.

let the good times rolllllll

my tipsy ass. nuff said.

celebrations have commenced. i did the disneyland bday thang, got piss ass drunk all while in denial of my bad case of bronchitis. helllllooooo nurse! im such a badass. all the drinkin & smokin just exacerbated my symptoms. my chest hurts from all the coughin but its was all worth it. as dan tells me, "let the good things happen to you." & that i will. im just gonna keep ridin this wave & lettin the good times rolllllllllllllllllllllllll.